What makes a friend.

What makes a friend.

A young girl's heart is broken. She looks to the sea of faces she calls her friends, searching for one kind face. Most turn away. She finds one kind face who is standing there with her arms open wide, waiting for her to be embraced. To let her cry, hold and love unconditionally. 

Curled up on the couch, a woman feels she can't face another day. She holds her phone desperately hoping someone will call and rescue her from her deepest despair. The phone rings. A friendly voice offering encouragement. To reach out, to let her meltdown, to accept her no matter what.

Jesus paints a beautiful picture of friendship.
He left the 99 sheep to find the 1 lost sheep.
He spoke to the woman at the well when no one else would.
He protected a woman being stoned for sinning and let her go free.
He formed 12 unlikely friendships with his disciples- murderers and tax collectors.
He forgave Peter's mistakes even knowing his good friend would betray him.
He reached out to the undesirable people, he cared for the sick, the poor, the needy, the widowed, he showed compassion to the unlovely.

Jesus loved so much that he laid down his life for his friends. He died on the cross for his friends. Jesus commanded us to love in the same way. He calls us his friends if we follow his example. He says there is no greater love than to lay down our life for our friends. (John 15:12-14)

No greater friendship than to show an undying, unconditional love. 
When someone is lost, you can be a friend.
When someone has sinned against you, you can forgive.
When someone needs to meltdown, cry, or scream, you can be a shoulder.
When someone can't find any hope, you can be encouragement.

Faithfulness is another quality brought up throughout scripture. Jesus gets angry with people and calls them out when they are unfaithful to God. He hates gossip and greed, money and immorality. When we love these things we can't love God. Jesus calls us to be faithful to God. (James 4:4-12)

Jesus teaches us to look to the interest of others, not ourselves. He says to count others more significant than ourselves. To be humble in spirit and to be genuinely concerned for the welfare of others. This is a life-giving friendship. (Philippians 2:2-30)

Paul goes from town to town, teaching the words of Jesus and sharing encouragement to fellow believers. He teaches that we are to build one another up. We are to hold each other up in times of trial. If we live in Christ, we are living in light and we must encourage each other to stay in light. We are to be aware of our surroundings and keep each other strong. (1 Thessalonians 5:5-11)

So often we fail as friends and friends fail us.

We say things we don't mean, we don't think before we speak, we say what we feel. And words are often miscommunicated. Sometimes we assume the worst in people, sometimes we have emotional outbursts and say unkind things. We are imperfect, flawed people. Jesus shows us a different way to be a friend.

Jesus shows protection, love, faithfulness, humility, strength and encouragement.
Jesus shows forgiveness.

We long for great, deep, meaningful friendships but so often we aren't willing to be that friend. Why is that?