Sex is a gift. It is put into a box. It's delicately wrapped up with pretty pink wrapping paper. A beautiful piece of ribbon is tenderly tied around the box and lovingly tagged with a Love note to "My Future Husband".
All kinds of sex words are floating around in the halls of your school, friends put pressures on you, boys may even be pressuring you to have sex. My lovely lady friends, all those "words" you hear, it's all STILL SEX. Every time you talk about sex, play with the line before sex, it's ALL giving a piece of your heart to a man that probably will not be your future husband. It's ALL ripping a little bit more of your pretty pink wrapping paper. That Love tag on your gift is to your future husband. The question IS NOT "How far is too far?" But the question IS "How can I protect my pretty pink gift?" My hope is that you treasure that gift that you so tenderly wrapped and give it to your husband on your wedding night.
I know some of you have already ripped some of your wrapping paper, maybe you already opened the gift. Maybe you didn't know how SPECIAL the gift is, maybe NO ONE TOLD YOU, maybe no one is willing to talk to you about mistakes you've made, maybe you have questions but you have no one to ask. My heart is so full of love for you and that is only a small reflection of GOD'S LOVE FOR YOU.
Ladies of beauty..... accessorize yourselves in PURITY, in being a lady in waiting for your future husband, in being Holy and Righteous, in pursuing God's best for your life.
My story..... I will be completely transparent with you for the sake of laying down my mistakes so you may learn from me. It's never fun hanging out my dirty laundry but as a Christian woman who wants to sacrifice my life to help others on their journey, I will be as transparent as I can be in hopes that you, my beautiful friend, can know God's TRUTH about sex. I won't dumb it down for you because I believe you are MORE than you even believe you are and you can handle the truth, you're probably even pursuing the truth.
I was blessed to be in a very solid youth group in high school. I had wonderful youth leaders and a pastor who didn't dumb down his message. He treated us like adults and believed we were MORE than we believed we were. I was blessed with parents who I respected and openly talked to all through high school. I never went through a "I'm too cool for my parents" stage. Parents are your friends. Talk to them, ask them your questions, tell them your hopes and fears. When the topic of SEX comes up, I hope you have people to talk to.
When I was 14 years old going into high school, I had friends performing oral sex and having sex with their boyfriends but because I was TOLD about sex so young, I already made my decision to not have sex. When I was a Freshman in high school, my youth group had a purity month and my parents bought me a ring to symbolize my commitment to remaining pure until I was married. I understood the gift of Sex and that is why I am trying to tell YOU what a special gift it is. I started writing LOVE LETTERS to my future husband when I was 14 years old and put them in a special box. I wore my ring proudly and because I believed in purity so much, I tattooed it on my hip (although I don't suggest doing that, I now 8 years later wish I didn't) but my point is PURITY IS THAT IMPORTANT TO HOLD ONTO.
YOU are a beautiful treasure. God thinks you are a BEAUTY among all the thorns of your world. I got MADE FUN of A LOT, a lot because I chose to not kiss boys. Sweet 16 and Never Been Kissed. I had a boyfriend get ANGRY with me because I wouldn't kiss him. I had another boyfriend leave me at a dance because I wouldn't dance dirty with him. I had friends pressure me to have sex because "it's fun". But I was WAITING for my first kiss to be with a man who was special enough to get my first.
I graduated high school and never been kissed. I dated several guys my first year of college and STILL never been kissed. I was happily making friends, building friendships with guys and writing my letters to my future husband.
It wasn't until I was 19 years old did I have my FIRST KISS with a man I grew to deeply love and thought God was leading me to marry. Here's some dirty laundry. We played with the "how far is too far" line and made mistakes. I ripped into my wrapping paper but desperately tried to keep my gift special. You have to know that playing with the line is a SLIPPERY SLOPE. The slippery slope is all those "words" you hear in your hallways about sex but you might not consider sex. It's STILL giving pieces of your heart away. Someone like myself who tried so hard to remain pure and I struggled because I am still human. We ended the relationship. We stopped trusting each other, we started fighting a lot out of guilt and regret. And MANY pieces of my heart were now his.
God began restoring my heart but AGAIN I made mistakes with another boyfriend. He PRESSURED me into playing in the grey zone. I still desperately tried to stay true to my commitment but it's difficult once you START PLAYING WITH THE LINE. Holding hands might be innocent, but it LEADS to petting which leads to kissing which leads the slippery slope and before you know it, you feel guilty. You think to yourself "oh just a little bit more, I love him so much" but then it goes too far.
I ended that relationship and took a YEAR to seek God's heart on boundaries and relationships and love and sex. And in that time, God RESTORED my heart fully and completely. I wrote a very difficult letter to my future husband about the mistakes I made and weaknesses I discovered. And half way through my year of being single, God brought Sam into my life. We built a solid friendship, a solid foundation. He walked through that season of restoration with me. We developed trust and love.
Sam is now my husband. Our wedding night was the MOST special and wonderful night of my life. I gave him the gift of sexual purity. I was bruised and a little scarred but the gift of sex was worth the wait. I gave him my box of many letters and we shared love the way God intended it to be. It was all WORTH THE WAIT. Through all my struggles and mistakes, through all my questions, I STILL remained a virgin. I gave pieces away to other guys, but God put all those pieces back together and saved me from ripping into my gift. Sam and I struggled as well, but with God's strength and help, we waited for our wedding night. It's still possible in this culture to be a VIRGIN. I am a walking testimony and I hope that the BEAUTY and PURITY and STRENGTH of God only shines through my message. He carried me through and He can carry you through too.
Ohhh my beautiful friend how desperately I want you to hear my heart. You may have made mistakes already but like God restored me, He can restore you. You may not know the truth but I pray you do now. You may already hold on tight to your treasure and I praise the Lord for that. You are so SO beautiful and YOU ARE SO WORTH THE WAIT. Your future husband deserves ALL of you, even if you are a little bruised and scarred up and broken.
Sex is a beautiful gift.... FOR YOUR HUSBAND.
1 Thessalonians 4:3-7 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honourable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.
You can read more about sex in the Bible. Song of Solomon describes God's design for sex and marriage. Hosea is a story of unconditional love. In Ephesians, man and wife leave their parents and become one. Click here to learn more what the Bible says about Sex and Marriage.
THanks for sharing Heidi. Beautiful post.
ReplyDeleteLove you Heidi ! Such a wise post! Thank u for sharing this....many girls and women need to hear this. :)
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