Many of you lovely ladies know our road to finding a home, my longing to make wherever we live a home. We are living at my in-law's, living out of suitcases for what was supposed to be two weeks while we waited for our house closing date.
And so the story unfolds.
A story where I begin to find my courage, my brave.
Two days before the closing date, we find out news that some paperwork wasn't filed correctly with the seller. I looked at my husband baffled and asked if that meant no closing, what did that mean? And here I sit TWO months later writing to you all.
(Is there some pattern with two going on for some reason?)
Two months of extreme highs and extreme lows, lots of laughter, sitting in the Fall sunshine, and lots of tears, the deep, painful, hot kind of tears I haven't cried in a long time. Another season of trials all piled into one. None of it making any sense. My husband had a work injury and out of work for 6 weeks, we had to pull our offer on the house, every door was closing, we question and agonize why God is making us go through so many hard trials or doing so many things the hard way.
We have moments of weakness and question and toil why we can't get a break this year.
God still allows hard things to happen to faithful people.
It's so easy to give up, to roll over and die, to believe all the doubts and worries.
It takes a BRAVE woman to fight off those thoughts and feelings.
It takes a BRAVE woman to embrace the opportunities in the middle of hard times.
It takes a BRAVE woman to press on and step forward in faith.
It takes a BRAVE woman to stay faithful in love to her family.
I cried out to God and asked why I couldn't have my own house,
to cook for my family,
to be connected to my community,
to sleep in our cozy room with my cute husband,
to have our decorations on the wall.
It takes a BRAVE woman to BELIEVE God is still working things out for our good, even when it seems hopeless and the days feel long.
I want to be brave.
I want to fight and step forward in faith.
And we'll have an EVEN better story to tell when God gives us a house.
For now I guess I'm supposed to make our "suitcases" a home.
No comments:
Post a Comment