Carrots and Applesauce.

I have been trying everything to get my little guy to eat veggies. He won't eat them. One week he shovels in sweet potatoes, picks up each tiny pea one at a time, spoon feeds himself mashed up green beans and the next week spits out every kind of vegetable I offer.

And then I find the magical combination. 

Cooked carrots and applesauce. 

I was sitting at the table watching him feed himself carrot after carrot, giggling and laughing. Every time I cheered for him, he squealed. That little scrunchy face and those chubby cheeks staring back at me. I was still in my pajamas at noon and quite honestly, it was taking every ounce of my energy to cheer for him. All I wanted to do was go back to bed when he went down for his nap and I thought is this the real life of being a mom to a one year old? Trying different food combinations to get your baby to eat and sitting in your pjs at lunch time? 

I don't know what it was about this particular day, we've had a lot of quiet days this first year and days I never got out of my pjs. I guess what I want is for moms to be real with each other. 

The first year of being a mom was more than I could imagine but the loneliness was a complete shock to me. No one tells you how lonely it will be. No one tells you how normal it is to have lots of quiet days. No one talks about it. The magazines and books don't mention it. My girlfriends are all out working full time jobs, living these glamorous lifestyles and my reality is life on this couch while he naps or playing on the floor or experimenting with different vegetables. It's been waking up every morning and thinking what we could do or where we could go between nap times.

I don't say that as a pity party, but to be one mom who is willing to admit the truth. We all compare ourselves to other moms (you know you do!), we compare the outward lives of our friends on facebook to our boring inward lives, but ya know nobody is going to post a picture of their quiet days on the couch in their pjs so of course their outward lives are going to look a lot better. 

I could post a picture of Asher sitting in his chair eating carrots and applesauce wearing only his diaper or I can post a picture of him in his cute overalls on a beautiful long awaited spring day at the park. I'm choosing today to focus on those precious moments instead of drudge my way through the dull, quiet days. 

All that to say, you are not alone. You're just not my mama friend. 

But you can choose to smile at the precious moments too and know it's ok to have days you never get out of your pjs, and that doesn't make you a bad mom at all.